Today I had my annual physical. It was sort of wrong on many levels. Yes, I'm going into them all, so you may want to click away now.
1) The conversation during said exam centered around sweet potato recipes. Doc favors a candied yam with brown sugar, peach liqueur and a ton of butter, but two of his family members keep kosher, so he was modifying. I do a baked sweet potato with orange juice and zest and whole cranberries. Doc thinks he might try it with Cuantro.
I'm easing you in here, can you tell?
2) The appointment was scheduled during the typical time of what I'm going to call my morning constitutional. I really had to go right before the exam. After debating the added discomfort of not going versus the effort trying to make sure I was as tidy afterward as before, I decided to wait. Not sure if I made the right decision, but I did not embarrass myself. I do, however, wonder what a woman looks like when trying not to embarrass herself.
3) After doc was done with his part, I realized I've never mentioned to him that I think I may have been stitched oddly after Fynn was born. So I reached right down there, fumbled around until I found what I was looking for and tried to point it out. He didn't see anything right away, so I had to do it again. He felt around and finally found what I was talking about. Turns out I have a sebaceous cyst that he's going to leave alone for now. Greaaat. (Uh, not that I want to be lanced or anything... I would really prefer the magic wand treatment, please.)
4) After he said, "See you next year!" I mentioned that we may have to switch insurances (from one type of giant to another) next summer. If so, I won't be seeing him. He hugged me and said he would miss having me as his patient, and that he wouldn't miss all of his patients. All very nice, but as he hugged me I thought about the fact that I was wearing a very short pink cotton cape backwards and had a large pink square of fabric covering most of my lower half. I was basically naked. I've been smelling his cologne all day long.
Well, that's it on my end.